Sunday, 13 June 2010

Montana & me : Last night.

I’m bloody zonked. Fact. After friday night on the radio I didn’t get to sleep until silly-o’clock and then I awoke yesterday at 1.30pm. Around 4pm I went to get my hair done, which took forever. Have you ever been to Africa? Well, I can tell you that things move at a very, very laid back pace over there. So, knowing this, I still decided to go to an afro hair dressers (that I’ve been to before) where one hairdresser was simultaneously trying to do around 3 people’s hair. This is fine if you have a spare few hours to kill then you can twiddle your thumbs or flick through gossip magazines. I did have time but I didn’t want to spend it in there. I’d rather have been in my bed getting some quality snooze time before my sexy guest arrived. So, what you really want to know about isn’t my hair, is it now? No, indeed it’s not. You want to know about last night, right?
Yep, the enigma that is Montana came over my... He came to my place.

I’m not sure how much detail I’m willing to go into about it. .. hmmm. I know he reads this and it would be a crime for his head to swell ! haaha! Besides, I’m a lady and ladies only spill all the beans to friends - What was that? You’re my friends? True, true, OK then, here we go...
Nah, I can’t. Although, I can say this much - we had a sexy tussle which delivered all I was hoping for. Montana is a big guy (yes, fully in proportion, OK!) who is well able to put me in my place. Of course this is in the friendliest manner possible. Yum!
A huge turn on for me is his physical dominance. It’s not his size that turns me on to be truthful, it’s his strength. The differences between men and women are what I enjoy most. Physical strength, body hair, facial hair, body shape, muscle mass.

Montana is sure of himself and he’s laid back. Saying that I don’t actually know how he is outside of my little flat because we’ve never done anything more than been indoors, but that's OK. It's what our 'friendship' is based on.
He’s not manic, like I can be. He's pretty self contained. I find calmness, and gentleness very attractive characteristics in men. Anyone who is loud and talks too much or is a show-off, need not apply.

Anyway, Montana stayed the night last night. He’s never stayed before so I was surprised that he did. I knew it wouldn’t be awkward because we get on well and inspite of him being affectionate and tactile – “Oh, he’s a player trying to reel you in” a friend said to me today – I wasn’t sure how he’d be since he’s avoided like the plague staying over before. OK, so just how honest should I be right now? Hmmm...Montana will read this. Oh well, OK, here we go...

It was delightful having him stay. He’s fantastic at snuggles and kisses and he’s good to my nose. My nose?? Yep, my nose. I like having my nose suckled and petted, it’s a comfort thing, alright... I'm sure you have your little comfort blankets. OK, moving on. *ahem*

I like Montana, he’s all right. However,I am concerned about one thing: attachment. Mine. Not his.
I have always known that this is nothing more than a good time, giggles and extended cuddles that make me - well, you know...

So, what’s the problem? Err, I may be about to say this next sentence because I am tired, but I am concerned that the simple (and normal) act of him actually staying over may grow inside me a desire to see him more frequently. We can’t have that.
I can imagine him rolling his eyes right now as he reads that and thinking 'you've blown it now Clare. I'll never stay again, ever! Why do women have to do this!!'... not all of them do!

Oh, whattevver trevvorr
Montana and I have managed to see each other infrequently enough to keep an emotional distance between us and that’s been fine, but I guess I wouldn’t mind seeing him a little more regularly (why, just cos he bloody stayed the night??) but I don’t want to start catching feelings. Feelings?? God no! They’re so 2009! Urrgh!
Am I saying this just because the guy slept in my fucking bed? god, what's happening to me!

(I find it all slightly amusing to be honest)

The thing is, I don’t know how I will feel over the next few days. I’ll probably be over my desire to see more of him and we shall continue with our usual bi-monthly encounters.
Regardless, I trust him to freak out sufficiently by what he’s just read that he will definitely ensure that we stick to our sporadic get-togethers.

Maybe my friend is right – he is a p.l.a.y.e.r .
And if he is? He does it good. It's up to me to keep my shit together...

Arrgh! – just seen my stars for today 'Venus moves, express your feelings!’ – That word again - Feelings!
No, not me. Feelings are sooo 2009.

Montana - run!

(Oh dear. I'm sitting here alone, laughing my head off! I'm such a silly-billy)