I was MORTIFIED.

The past couple of days have been weird. A bit odd. I'll tell you something that happened to me yesterday, and had I been able to get online last night I’d have told you then.
Unusual things happen in life which are sometimes, funny, embarrassing, farcical, and really, really uncomfortable. The event of yesterday, for me, was mortifying. Let’s add that to our list of event ‘mortifying’.

There I was yesterday sitting quietly minding my own business when 2 guys walked into the office where I work. I know one of them – he’s been in before. He’s friendly and chatty so we chatted. The other guy I didn’t know, and I ignored him ‘cos he was incessantly staring at me. I wouldnt’ even look at him.
I hate men behaving like that, It’s creepy and annoying. I wouldn’t have minded so much if he’d been attractive, but he was actually not one little bit handsome. Not at all.
Anyway – they sat for maybe 15 minutes waiting to go into a meeting then the one I know said to me – are you from blah,, blah...
“Err, yes, how do you know?” I asked, thinking it a bit odd. How’d he know?!
Then the other guy – the staring one started grinning and said ‘You don’t remember do you Clare?’ My heart rate went up a little. For a second I didn’t remember a damn thing – and then – FUCK – I vaguely remembered:
I’d slept with him, years ago – when I was a fucked outta my head.

I was MORTIFIED , HUMILIATED, CRUSHED, HORRIFIED.

But that was then – this is now. And today, it ain’t gonna happen.
NO FUCKING WAY JOSE!

By the way: Am on BBC London radio ce soir, on the legendary Jo Good Show. Yiippee!!




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